ME AND BILL

Oh me and Bill went hunting moose
In a pickup truck seldom used
With the horsepower burned up long ago
Scarcely enough to make her go
And it had very little brakes
Made the squeaking poor brakes make
We rode to the top of the hill
Driving made like stunned folks will.

And we came down the hill
At the wheel was poor Bill

Chorus:
Well the tires started screaming
And the radiator's steaming
And the speed it was increasing
And Bill he's hard of seeing
We swerved along the wheeling
To avoid a great collision
With a big bull moose at the bottom of the hill.

Well when I screamed Bill hit the brakes
We missed the hairy ambulate
But with the fright the engine died
Couldn't climb the other rise
Speed dropped, til we stood still
And backwards we went down the hill
And if the brakes were poor at first
They were bloody useless in reverse.

And we backed down the hill
At the wheel was poor Bill

Chorus:
Well the tires started screaming
And the radiator's steaming
And the speed it was increasing
And Bill he's hard of seeing
We swerved along the wheeling
To avoid a great collision
With a big bull moose at the bottom of the hill.

Our pickup truck had no tailgate
We scooped him off his four long legs
And though that was not real abuse
The moose we caught was not amused 
As we rolled back up the grade
The moose recovered and stood up straight
It jumped clear when we stopped 
And down the hill the thing took off

So we followed down the hill
Here was me and there was Bill.

Chorus:
Well the tires started screaming
And the radiator's steaming
And the speed it was increasing
And Bill he's hard of seeing
We swerved along the wheeling
To avoid a great collision
With a big bull moose at the bottom of the hill.

We met again in the valley below
Rolled to a stop and the rad did blow
With frothing mouth and glaring eyes
"I've had enough" the moose decides
I hops out to shoot this thing
Bill turns chicken and took to wing
As I gained to make the kill
"I've got the bullets" roared stunned Bill.

And it chased Bill up the hill
Here was me and there was Bill.

Chorus:
Well the gap it was decreasing
I could hear the thing a-wheezing
And as I gained my freedom
The moose took Bill and treed him
And he clung there all evening
And I was glad to leave him but
The next time I wants moose, I'm a-not going hunting with Bill!
Yes, the next time I wants moose, I'm a-not going hunting with Bill!